


Concrete

by EliDeetz



Series: SPN Fluff Bingo 2018 [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, SPN Fluff Bingo 2018, Season/Series 13 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-09
Updated: 2018-03-09
Packaged: 2019-03-29 03:04:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13918041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EliDeetz/pseuds/EliDeetz
Summary: "Everything had changed. Nothing was like it used to be. You, the Winchesters, Castiel, the world… him.Lord, how much he’d changed."[Written for SPN Fluff Bingo 2018 (Square filled: Snuggling in bed) & @thewhiterabbit42 Disney Writing Challenge.]





	Concrete

 

Your room was silent and dark, except for the alarm’s bright red numbers shining from corner of your nightstand. You’d gone to bed hours ago, but couldn’t keep your eyes shut for longer than a couple of minutes. No matter how much you turned and tried to settle, sleep seemed unattainable.

There were too many things in your mind, making you unable to simply brush them away and have some rest. They seemed to hide somewhere in your subconscious during the day, only to come out at night, screaming louder than a banshee.

Everything had changed. Nothing was like it used to be. You, the Winchesters, Castiel, the world… him.

Lord, how much he’d changed.

Only him and Asmodeus knew what the hell had happened in that filthy, dark cell. But you, and everybody else, knew how much it’d changed him.

Gabriel did his best to act his usual self. He still pranked and teased everybody that crossed his way, but the mischievous glint in his eyes wasn’t there anymore. He carried himself as if nothing mattered, confident and uninterested. Still, his smile wasn’t the same, and you often found him spacing out, standing with faltered posture, as if he tried to protect himself from _something_.

He tried, he tried so damned much. And you would do everything to support him, if he’d only let you.

You’d met him in far more occasions than either Sam and Dean before he died, or disappeared. The relationship you had wasn’t anything more than a flirty friendship, or at least that’s what you constantly told yourself.

As you drowned in thoughts of him, the door of your room creaked as it opened. Soon, the bed dipped behind you, yet you didn’t dare moving at all. You closed your eyes slowly, and tried to pace your respirations. You were used to it, but it never failed to affect your nerves.

It was very likely he’d knocked, but you hadn’t heard. Gabriel always checked to see if you were asleep before laying next to you. You never were, but whatever arrangement there was between you, neither of you dared to acknowledge yet.

You’d vowed not to say a thing until he did.

The first night he spent in your bed, was a week after being rescued and brought back to the bunker by Ketch, Cas and the Winchesters. At the time, you hadn’t the slightest idea he was even alive. You tried your best not to pass out as he was coming down the stairs, beaten and almost passed out, leaned on his brother’s shoulder for support.

While his grace restored, Gabriel slept as much as his nightmares allowed. You noticed he could only sleep without interruption if he was by your side.

The archangel moved and tossed in his spot, trying to find a comfortable position to sleep. After many tries, he finally took his usual one: curled up in a ball right behind you, one of his arms around your waist.

He took a deep sigh, and quickly fell asleep. It didn’t took you long to join him.

_The rainstorm was almost unbelievable, if it wasn’t for the fact you were witnessing it. You’d been stuck in the same hotel room for a little over two days, the weather making it impossible for you to meet the Winchesters in Indiana._

_The lights flickered, and the television began to change channels at a fast pace. You knew it wasn’t the storm._

_“What’s wrong?” You asked in a low voice, barely above a whisper._

_He was standing in front of the window, a stern look on his face as he watched the rain fall. But his whiskey eyes were empty, and unfocused. After a moment, he shook his head, and ran a hand over his dark golden curls._

_“Thing One and Two don’t need you for the case anymore. But they got themselves in trouble,” he answered, closing his eyes as he smirked almost bitterly. “_ _**Big** _ _trouble.”_

_You sat on the edge of the bed, and gripped the sheets nervously. He seemed stressed, which was incredibly rare for him. Something told you the boys were going to have difficulty coming out of it alive._

_“Take me to them,” you almost ordered, hoping your concern wouldn’t weaken your drive._

_Gabriel turned towards you, too quickly for your liking. Had he been human, he surely would’ve pulled a muscle in the process. He stared you down, frowning deeply while doing so._

_“No, I’ll go.”_

_“I’m not asking for permission, I’m telling you to take me.” You raised from the bed, and stood right in front of him._

_His eyes never left yours, the expression on his face was unreadable. Things were far more serious than you thought._

_“I said no,” he repeated. “I’ll go and zap them out, we… will be back before you know it.” He hesitated as he spoke, it almost went over your head. But it didn’t._

_“You’re lying, take me with you. We can help them together,” you insisted, moving quickly to dress up properly, given you were in your pajamas._

_He gripped your arm tightly, keeping you in place without a struggle. The force he used wasn’t enough to hurt, but it was far more than he’d ever used with you._

_“It’s dangerous for you, there’s too many things that won’t think twice about having you as a snack. Stay here,” Gabriel pleaded._

_“If you go, I’m following behind. I don’t care if this damned rain won’t let me drive.”_

_Gabriel took a sharp breath in, now placing both hands on your arms, trying his best to remain calm._

_“You’ll thank me when they’re safe.”_

_Before you could say anything, he leaned down and pressed his lips against yours in a chaste kiss. It didn’t last long, but it was shocking enough for you not to react as he placed his fingers on your forehead, and sent you into a deep sleep._

There was a sharp pain inside your chest, causing you to slowly open your eyes. You often dreamt about the night Gabriel came face to face with Lucifer, while you laid in that hotel bed. Thankfully, it had become less frequent since he was back.

Your eyes drifted towards the clock once more, it was almost 5am. There was more than enough time for you to go back to sleep.

As consciousness came back to you, the weight over your waist and the warmth behind your back almost scared you. Gabriel was still in you room, which wasn’t usual, considering he slept less and less as he got better. The fact that you never once woke up to still find him there, made it somewhat easier to pretend he didn’t sleep with you when you interacted later in the day.

You suddenly wondered how he would look sound asleep.

Would his lips form a pout like they did when he was focused on something? Would his hair be a mess? Did his chest moved up and down rhythmically, or not at all?

Despite him being there every night, you’d never actually faced him as he rested. If you dared to try and take a peek, there was a chance of waking him up, and making everything more awkward than it already was. Then again, that seemed to be only chance you would ever have to watch him sleeping.

Slowly, you began to turn towards the archangel, carefully enough not to disturb him. It looked like you’d succeed, judging by his lack of movement. The second you were able to see his face, however, you froze.

Gabriel was wide awake.

Even in the darkness of the room, you could see his golden eyes shining as if they possessed light of their own. The expression in his face was blank, but he was staring deeply into your eyes. You tried to think of something to say, but your brain felt dumb, and slow.

His grip around your waist became tighter, as he moved your body closer to him. He was relaxed, and seemingly comfortable. Even in the soft, red glow of the light, he looked beautiful, and timeless.

A couple of rouge strands of hair fell over his forehead, you adventured to move them away with a trembling hand. As you brushed them behind his ear, one of his hands raised to press your palm against his cheek before you could pull away.

He leaned into your touch, and closed his eyes for a moment. The warmth of his skin transferred into yours.

The moment no longer felt tense, it was now strangely intimate, and almost sacred. Never in your whole life you’d pictured yourself in a situation like this, let alone with a literal archangel.

There was much that could be told. From how much you’d missed him, to how greater your life was since you met. You felt that he knew, but it wasn’t enough, you needed to say it.

“Sleep,” he suddenly said, barely above a whisper.

You softly nodded in response, once again letting him pull you even closer. He smelled like berries and chocolate, causing a faint smile to pull your lips.

The beating of his heart, and soothing warmth, soon put you back to rest.

 

* * *

  
He sat at the edge of your bed, simply watching you as you tried to pick up an outfit for the day. Which you had been trying to do for at least 30 minutes. It normally didn’t take you as long, but having him staring was taking its toll on your nerves.

You were hoping he would talk, but not a word had left his mouth, and he still didn’t show signs of wanting to leave anytime soon.

Everything was new, foreign, and you didn’t know how to react, what to say or do. Judging by the way he was looking at you it seemed like neither did he.

After finally settling for the usual jeans and a flannel, you made your way towards the door to go take a shower, but you stopped as soon as you took the doorknob.

What if you came back to find him gone again?

You looked at him over your shoulder, to find him still looking at you with the same blank expression painted over his face. It’d suddenly become annoying, as if he was internally mocking you.

You approached him with strong, heavy steps, unwilling to let things continue as they were.

“ **If there’s something you want to tell me, just tell me! Is there something you wanna tell me?** ” You asked in a poignant tone, visibly irritated by the position he’d put you in.

He narrowed his eyes at you, slightly tilting his head before replying. “ **Is there something you want to hear?** ”

Oh, he was definitely mocking you. You, your feelings, and your generosity.

Still, he left you speechless once more. No matter how much you knew him, a smartass answer in a serious situation never failed to throw you off. And _he knew_.

You tapped your bare foot against the cement floor impatiently, your mind running at a hundred miles per second, wondering if it was better to let the subject die. Whatever the subject was in the first place.

“Do you know why I come here in the first place?” Gabriel interrupted your thoughts, genuinely curious about your answer.

Instead of replying, you remained quiet, and made a face to describe how obvious it was that you hadn’t the slightest idea.

He stood from your bed, and raised his chin as he allowed the tense silence to grow stronger.

“You,” the archangel finally said. “I don’t sleep, I don’t need it anymore. And I know you’re always awake when I come here,” he confessed.

You felt yourself grow smaller at his words, uncertain about why his bluntness wasn’t as refreshing as you used to find it before. Your mind was reeling, internally exploding as you processed every word he’d said.

“A few months ago, as soon as I stepped inside the bunker, you were the first person I could recognize,” Gabriel said in a calm voice, and a soft expression. “Your voice, your heartbeat, your light. _You_ keep me sane, you make me believe I’m no longer locked.”

“When I left you that night,” he continued, knowing you weren’t going to say a thing. “I was scared, I knew things weren’t going to end well. I wanted you by my side.” He talked about the night in Indiana, making you wonder if he had seen your dreams.

“Then _why_ didn’t you take me?” The question left your lips before you could think about it, surprising you as you found your voice again.

Gabriel clenched his jaw, and took a long time to think about what to say next. “They were having people as appetizers, _why_ do _you_ think?”

You lowered your eyes to the ground, bothered about the tone in his voice. You figured it was useless to talk about what happened and what didn’t.

“The thing is,” he reached and took one of your hands in his, and with the other, raised your face for you to look at him. “I know I’m free, not inside that God forsaken cell. And now, I need you to realize I’m here. I’m alive.”

After a moment, you found the strength to speak again, “you were gone for so long… It got to a point where I was afraid you hadn’t been real.”

He stood in silence, his penetrating gaze glued to you, and his thumbs brushing the back of your hands. There was a knot that began to form inside your throat, it felt as if it would suffocate you, unless you continued talking.

“After so much shit, I just forced myself to _not_ think about you.” You grimaced at your own words, forcing tears and pain to remain buried deep within you. “And then, suddenly you’re back. It’s both a dream and a nightmare. What if I went crazy, and one day you disappear again?”

You recalled how difficult it’d been for the Winchesters to understand your breakdown, after they told you he was dead. As well as why you insisted on keeping the copy of the cheesy porno he’d given them.

Still tightly holding your hands in his, he raised them to his chest, and placed them in the middle of it. His heartbeat was loud and strong against your palms, causing waves of relief to ripple through you.

“Feel that?” He asked, low enough not to disrupt as you calmed yourself with the sound of his beating heart. “That’s as real as it gets, sugar. I’m here, I won’t disappear.”

His words were heavy, and meaningful. They hit you like a ton of bricks, but you knew it was going to take time getting used to him again.

“Is that a promise or a threat?”

The characteristic devious smirk of his you hadn’t seen in years plastered over his face, as he finally seemed to relax for the first time since you woke up. He pulled you softly, which you took as a sign to find your way into his arms.

You placed your arms around his waist, and buried your face on his chest. He hugged you back, placing one of his hands on your head to brush your hair with his fingers.

“Talk about codependency. We could give Sam and Dean-o a run for their money,” Gabriel joked, finding a way to lighten the moment.

“I’d like to think we aren’t at that level,” you muttered, closing your eyes as you lost yourself in him.

“ _Yet_ , in a couple weeks you won’t be able to be without me,” he assured. “Don’t worry, I won’t judge you. I’m a delight.”

Gabriel went on and on, finding more things to make fun about. You simply laughed, and allowed him to joke, while neither of you considered letting go of the other. You couldn’t help asking yourself where would all of this take you, but the way he was holding you tightly against him, was letting you know he didn’t plan going anywhere soon.

And that was enough.

 


End file.
